it's time to move on.

dear loggers,
its typical that once you make a decision, there will be point and times that you will regret that decision you made. and you will start to think should you undo dat decision of yours? this got me thingking very deep because this happened to me. a lot of times actually. well, what should i do then? i was greatly considering to go back to the old me and leave what i have ryte now all behind. but the question is,

WOULD THAT BE A WISE DECISION?

after LONG hours of thingking, my answer was no. because to me, in life, there's not much of a correct decision or bad decision. because to me, either ways there are consequences. and its completely human for people to make decisions based on their personal interest. and when it comes to making choices between A and B. there's this one situation in my life that i chose B. then, conflicts after conflicts, i started to realise that it was not wise at all to choose B over A. but does that makes it right for me to dump B and go back to A? for a while i said yes. but a few points of consideration.

1. B is now with me so why cant i just appreciate her?
2. true that i spent 3 years of my life with A, but does that mean that i have to spend the rest of it with her too?
3. A got her own life, why should i suffocate her with mine considering the fact that we are no longer attached?
4. yeahp i spent GOOD times with A, but my love now is B.

all in all, what doesnt kill you will only make you stronger. so what's wrong in trying. in psycological sense, after 3 years attached, of course the transition is a bit hard. but i can go through it. no excuse at all for me.

the conclusion is, miss A, thanx for everythng, since 27th August, 2006. i shall never forget. but its time for us to move on. i shall no longer disturb you, but i shall annoy you like i always do. and to miss B, lets do this....




cheers =D

offended

dear loggers,
i dont get the whole idea of trying to rank your friends or something. or trying to label your friends as TRUE FRIENDS and BAD FRIENDS who are somehow responsible for all the mistakes you've done (where's this thing called ability to think for yourself if everythngs their fault) dont you remember who are the ones who STOOD UP for you when you're down??? the ones who cry with you when you cry??? i dnt like to mengungkit. but this is reality and im soo hurt.

talking bout reality, i may not be the bestest friend u may have. the one who do everythng in exelence. but you know what? when you say "dude you're the best friend ive ever had" and under the same breath behind me u keep telling people that uve mixed around with the wrong people and you blame them for your failure.  the question is...

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU THINK WE FEEL?

mind you that yeah, we had a lot of WRONGLY fun, but is it our fault you folllowed us? dont you have a fucking brain to begin with? life's easy huh? take credits for your success. then blame others for your failure. if you think im a bad friend, just tell me so, because i di have a brain to think about it. STOP FUCKING PRETENDING!!! im sick of it.

and remember my post about jangan menyibuk contents blog orang??? let me tell you...if you're a no one, i wouldnt even bother a bit. but the problem is, u're my friend and yet you do this to me. we're hurt. anyways, good luck for your future life without us since that our presence only mean failure and damnation to you.

cheers =D

its that girl

dear loggers,
have you ever heard of that girl? she may not be the best person in the world, but i would cherish her as she's MINE. yup, she is. the name is HAZWANI RAZIN or the way she likes to call herself, wanie je. she's doing economics in IIU. how i met her? err, its better for me not to publicis it as it will no longer be special. so, what's so special about wanie. i swear to god i have no idea. but when it comes to relationships, does one have to posess a special somethng before it can happen? i say no. because when it comes to relationships, the moments spent together are special.not necessarily the person.

we may not have the most romantic relationship but it sure is special to me and i shall appreciate that. problems, A LOT. but as we go through, we lean to handle it better. and that's the whole idea. to my dear wanie,

I LOVE YOU

cheers =D

another theft!!!!

there's just fuckers in uia who really likes to steal. motherfucker you're going down!!!

5 in the morning

dear loggers,
what interesting thng that you can do at 5AM. everybody else is sleeping, its so dark and cold and calm. in a calm condition, i really like to think a lot. because at that moment i will feel so relaxed. so here i am. writing a new post into my blog. i still haven't got the whole idea of blogging. so, to me for now, its just random writing of thngs that crossed my mind.

and in moments like this, when you can feel something not right, or presence of somethng. probably you should just sign out, shut down and sleep. which i will do ryte away. till the next post.

cheers =D (wlaupun cuak, smiley maintain)

dissapointment

dear loggers,
have you guys feel very disapointed with your relationship? unless you're anti socials then most problably the answer would be yes. there's this one specific situation that happens to me very often lately.to explain that situation to you, i would ask questions too. have you ever sulk to your partner? then if you're texting her/him, you would probably stop right? then you expect your partner to call you or sumthng because you havent been replying to her/him. its true that it involves sometimes (most of the times sbenanye) petty stuffs, but you really expect them to do so. if you have been through the same situation, then welcome to the club.

everytime this situation happens to me, there will be awkward silence from my phone. because it rings ALL the time because of the endless text messaging. so if you and your partner text frequently, whenever either one stops, there must be somethning wrong right? so its just simple logic that sometimes save relationships. because even petty stuffs repeated again and again and again can leave a very deep scar. because if the same problem persists again and again, people would get bored of the same problems, then they will thnk that they've had enough. this is where somethng bad will happen. so to me, the essential in a relationship is communication.

my advice to lovers out there (also to myself la), if you sense somethng is wrong, communicate it with your partner. if they did not reply to ur texts, friggin call them. address them by asking them what's the problem and how can we solve it. because sometimes, people dont want solutions, they just want you to address it and to give them the feeling that the problem is being shared. especially with your partner.

conlclusion :

1. communication
2. address problems
3. try to find a way to create a win-win situation
4. dont ignore them by using the excuse of waiting for that someone to cool down because as long as the problem aren't addressed, he/she will NEVER cool down

i dnt know why this post is quite corny, but heck, its my blog, i can write whatever i want.

cheers =D

what do you think???

dear loggers,what do you think? im confused myself. just something for you guys to see. nothing more nothing less.

friendship

Dear loggers,
I dnt know why but I just feel like talking bout friendship. Because throughout my entire life, I really learn what friendship really means. Ever heard of a friend in need is friend indeed? Its fucking true. Because through my “journey” (cewah) I met A LOT of people who claims to be friends with me. On the other side, there are people who I deem as really are my friends. The GOOD people as I like to call them. Not that good la actually but at least they’re VERY nice to me. I started to get to know real friends, honestly, after im done with my spm. I started to be close with faliq, atong, botak, ah peng, faiz skema bastard, and many more(klau x tersenarai jgan terasa, gagah lak aku nak listkan sume) but klau nak cnfirmkan with me by asking… “hey K, am I ur friend??” LOL


Friends to me are the people who not only will stand up for you whenever you’re down. But they’ll bring u along together with them. Yeah, that’s my definition of true friends. Imperfect as they might be, but we’re cool because we know that no one is perfect and all of us watch each other’s backs. Not just the people who you go clubbing with, its not just that. Its WAY more than that. Basically we do everything together. Good times or the bad times. My phoenix family, my selayang friends, my nilai friends, u guys are the greatest!! I love you guys and you guys always will be number 1 on my list. People say that family comes first. Yeahp these people I do regard as my family members. May our friendship lasts machas!!


Cheers =D

conflicts

dear people,
hurm, i really dont know how to handle with conflicts. conflicts of interest. especially when it involves my best friends. have you ever got into those kind of shithole? two people are in conflict, and both of them are your best friends. you are trying your best to show that you're not siding anyone, but at the same time both of them demanded support from you. so how la? so i thnk the best way to go is to avoid these conflicts. because when it comes to the people who are VERY close to me, conflicts sometimes involve some petty stuffs added with misunderstanding. so it is avoidable. x susah pon lah. so my advice to these 2 machas. jgan gaduh2 and hug it out.





cheers =D

early in the morning.....soooooooooooo la....

dear loggers,
i woke up 12.30 pm(i got ms la today), and you know what's the best way to start ur day? mine started with hadi yelling to naqib that obviously woke me up (wonderful aint it?).

1. supposedly no outsiders are allowed to enter my dorm, but me myself has no respect to that rule so its okay.
2. whenever there's someone sleeping in the dorm (x kesah la pkul brape), strictly no noise making or you'll get the swearing of your life.
3. if i see ANYONE sleeping, i will try to resist the temptation to make noise.

so, eventually, it all boils down to this, if i can respect someone else sleeping, why cant u have the same frigging respect? is it because you are the minority of the dorm that you are denied from those rights? i dont mind being discriminated (really), but i go against the whole idea of wrong potrayal of your persnalities. you go around telling everybody that you are THE MAN. the leader or what not. and leaders dont disriminate. because in reality, you are just another average joe that backs up the one you have interest on and you dont really give a shit about others. so my friends, stop pretending.

cheers =D

only god can judge me...

this song is for all of those people who REALLY like to judge people around. u aint got no right to do so. you aint god



Only God can judge me, is that right?
Only God can judge me now
Only God baby, nobody else, nobody else

All you other motherfuckers get out my business

Perhaps I was blind to the facts, stabbed in the back
I couldn't trust my own homies just a bunch a dirty rats
Will I, succeed, paranoid from the weed
And hocus pocus try to focus but I can't see
And in my mind I'ma blind man doin time
Look to my future cause my past, is all behind me
Is it a crime, to fight, for what is mine?
Everybody's dyin tell me what's the use of tryin
I've been Trapped since birth, cautious, cause I'm cursed
And fantasies of my family, in a hearse
And they say it's the white man I should fear
But, it's my own kind doin all the killin here
I can't lie, ain't no love for the other side

Jealousy inside, make em wish I died

Oh my Lord, tell me what I'm livin for
Everybody's droppin got me knockin on heaven's door
And all my memories, of seein brothers bleed
And everybody grieves, but still nobody sees
Recollect your thoughts don't get caught up in the mix
Cause the media is full of dirty tricks
Only God can judge me


I hear the doctor standing over me
screamin I can make it
Got a body full of bullet holes layin here naked
Still I, can't breathe, somethings evil in my IV
Cause everytime I breathe, I think they killin me
I'm having nightmares, homicidal fantansies
I wake up stranglin, danglin my bed sheets
I call the nurse cause it hurts, to reminisce
How did it come to this? I wish they didn't miss
Somebody help me, tell me where to go from here
Cause even Thugs cry, but do the Lord care?
Try to remember, but it hurts
I'm walkin through the cemetary talkin to the, dirt
I'd rather die like a man, than live like a coward
There's a ghetto up in Heaven and it's ours, Black Power
is what we scream as we dream in a paranoid state
And our fate, is a lifetime of hate
Dear Mama, can you save me? And fuck peace
Cause the streets got our babies, we gotta eat
No more hesitation each and every black male's trapped
And they wonder why we suicidal runnin round strapped
Mista, Po-lice, please try to see that it's
a million motherfuckers stressin just like me
Only God can judge me

That which does not kill me can only make me stronger

(That's for real)
and I don't see why everybody feel as though
that they gotta tell me how to live my life
(You know?)
Let me live baby, let me live


Pac I feel ya, keep servin it on the reala
For instance say a playa hatin mark is out to kill ya
Would you be wrong, for buckin a nigga to the pavement?
He gon' get me first, if I don't get him fool start prayin
Ain't no such thing as self-defense in the court of law
So judge us when we get to where we're goin wearin a cross, that's real
Got him, lurked him, crept the fuck up on him
Sold a half a million tapes now everybody want him

After talkin behind my back like a bitch would

Tellin them niggaz, "You can fade him," punk I wish you would
It be them same motherfuckers in your face that'll rush up in your place
to get your safe, knowin you on that paper chase
Grass, glass, big screen and leather couch
My new shit is so fetti already sold a key of ounce
Bitch, remember Tupac and 4-Tay
Them same two brothers dodgin bullets representin the Bay
Pac when you was locked down, that's when I'll be around
Start climbing up the charts, so sick, but they tried to clown
That's why they ride the bandwagon still be draggin sellin lies

Don't think I don't see you haters, I know you all in disguise

Guess you figure you know me cause I'm a Thug
That love to hit the late night club, drink then buzz
Been livin lavish like a player all day
Now I'm bout to floss em off, player shit with 4-Tay
Only God can judge me

Only God main
  That right?
  That's real
  Hahahahahaha
Fuck everybody else, yaknowhatI'msayin?
Man, look here man
My only fear of death is comin back to this bitch reincarnated
That's for the homey mental
We up out

starters

dear loggers (if any),
as starters, i would like to stress on freedom of expression. anythng that's written and were to be written in this blog, i see as my freedom of expression. therefore, if any contents or posts in my blog deemed as offensive by someone, you would have the full liberty to leave. do not leave any comment that condemns this blog as it will NEVER be emtertained. constructive comments however are most welcomed. cheers =D

ohh here goes....

so here i am, having my own blog. at first i dont find any significance of havin a blog, but now i decided to just give it a try. owh well. later